Linn Liu

I'm in fifth grade, we are having "Inside Recess" because it is about 30 below outside and I have discovered that I have very statically-conductive shoes on. They are just one in a string of very cheap horribly stinky shoes that my mother and I got at Target.  They smell like a mixture of Cheetos left out in the hot sun and rotten garbage mixed with farts.  

Stinky though they are, they seem to give me super powers.  Blue sparks shoot from my fingertips when I scuff them on the floor, I learn after mistakenly touching the metal edge of table. I smile. I AM ZAPPER BOY!!  I am scuffling my feet on the strip of carpet in our classroom and zapping people pretty seriously with static and loving every minute of it.  Good kids, bad kids, friends and enemies; all are my victims. I am on a rampage.  Scuff-scuff- scuff!!  

I zap my friend John POP! "OWW!" Scuff-scuff-scuff!!  

I zap my friend Nick.  POP!  "OWW!"  Scuff-scuff-scuff!!

I zap the annoying class brain, Shanda.  POP!!  "OWW!!"  Scuff-scuff-scuff!!

I zap the kid who shoved me down on the playground once.  POP!  "OWW!!"  

I zap the weird Chinese girl named Linn Liu that no one talks to.  POP!!  "Ahh sss!!  Let me see yo finga."  I show her my finger.  She is mystified.  I am amused.  I assume there is no static electricity in China.  I scuff all the way across the room, then back.  I zap her again.  POP!!  "AHH SSSSS!!  HOW YOU DO THAT?!!"  But I never tell her.  

I am trying to figure out a way to zap our teacher whom I hate when recess ends. And just like that, I am a boring kid with stinky, plastic shoes again.