I Heart Golden Birthdays in NY
THE TRIP:
Owatonna and I got off to a very rocky start with our 1PM flight on Wednesday getting cancelled and Northwest damn near losing our luggage. I rebooked for 7AM on the 30th (my birthday) and Owatonna got on a 6AM flight. I flew into Newark. To get to NY I took the light rail to a tram to a plane to an Air Train to a NJ Transit train. The Hotel Grand Union in Midtown was small and economical. I can’t say it was beautiful but I had a very comfortable room of my own that was my own personal refuge away from everything. We were also less than a block from a subway line and you can’t beat that. I had no complaints.
June 30th, 2005: On my birthday we managed to see Ground Zero (which was the quietest, most haunting place. I started crying at one point and couldn’t stop. I went to work like normal in a tall building on that fateful day just like those poor people did. I had to walk away to compose myself.) After getting lost for awhile we ended up in Battery Park because we were going to try to take the ferry to Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty. Walking through the park we came across the foreigners selling the knock-offs and there right in front of me were Kate Spade bags which my sister had asked me to look for. I screwed up with the dickering and ended up paying $25 for one. The second I had the bag in my hands, there was a big commotion and all 25 or so of these guys scooped up the knock offs and literally disappeared into the crowd to avoid the police. It was crazy how fast it happened. We misread the sign at Castle Clinton where you buy tickets to the ferry. Instead, we walked down a few blocks and took the Staten Island ferry. It was humid and hazy but cool on the boat. I took a million pictures of the skyline and talked to a wonderful woman from Australia who explained the difference between a New Zealand accent and hers (there’s very little difference. Get them to say “six”. New Zealanders will pronounce it “sex”.) told me that on the morning of her 30th birthday her 2 year old son woke her up staring at her and proclaimed “You’re old!” and made me promise that on my 40th birthday I would be on a ferry in Sidney Harbor. We went back to the hotel so I could drop Kate Spade off and then hopped back on the subway bound for Coney Island. We had to stand on the train for damn near the entire 45 minutes and ended up in what I considered a pretty scary neighborhood. Coney Island is an ancient amusement park on the beach right in front of some projects. I rode The Cyclone twice (Owatonna could only handle it once) and damn near screamed my brains out. The three of us went on a space needle type thing that gave us a decent view of the surrounding area and then had a Nate’s dog at Nathan’s Famous, as New Yorkers call it. We then walked down to the beach and put our feet in the freezing Atlantic. Back on the train, we passed over the hugest, creepiest cemetery I have ever seen. It was dense and packed with headstones and monuments on both sides of the track as far as the eye could see. It went on forever and was very disturbing. After a quick stop back at the hotel we went to Stonewall bar (a cheesy dive where the gay liberation movement started) and walked around Greenwich Village and Chelsea a bit before finding a place called Sushi Samba to eat. It was very hoity-toity and expensive, but it was a quintessential New York moment. I still didn’t quite believe I was in New York, with the haziness and everything, so I wanted to see Time’s Square. We hopped back on the subway and walked through the area. It was nauseating. It felt like Disney World, Las Vegas and Corporate America threw up there. Every national chain you can think of is there, especially the vomitous over-priced ones like Planet Hollywood and Hard Rock Cafe. A total let-down, but very pretty to see.
July 1st, 2005: The next day was slightly less humid. I ended up taking a walk by myself in the morning and damn near getting lost, like an idiot. I had absolutely no sense of direction in New York and frankly I was too busy drooling over hot guys and seeing the sights to notice where the hell I was going. Eventually I met up with the girls who were hell-bent on going to Old Navy. I went with and quickly got really crabby in the crowded, non-air-conditioned store. I wanted to freak out and snap more than once before I realized that it was noon and I hadn’t eaten anything, therefore crabbiness. We went to a tiny little deli around the corner, ate and Owatonna and I parted ways with The Nurse because we had to get to Pulitzer Fountain in front of The Plaza to go on The Sex and the City tour. I won’t go into how Owatonna hadn’t made reservations even though I had made mine back in March and how she very nearly didn’t make it on the tour because the tour itself overshadowed everything. It was on an awesome luxury bus with TVs showing us the scene from every site we passed. We got out at The Pleasure Chest (where Charlotte bought the rabbit) Magnolia Bakery (where the best cupcakes in the world are made and the site of much lesbian break-up drama) Carrie’s front steps, the park where Carrie ran into Heather Graham and Nina Katz, Hotel Venus (where Charlotte bought lingerie) and Steve’s bar where we had Cosmos. Overall it was fascinating and well worth the $35. After the tour, we met up with The Nurse who had spent an infuriating and bathroom-less afternoon in Chinatown. We went to Grand Central terminal and ate at Oyster Bar which was the most beautiful restaurant I have ever seen. After that, we walked around and saw Rockefeller Center, St Patrick’s Cathedral, and the Chrysler Building. We had a total break-down of frustration at one point and called it an early night.
July 2, 2005: Owatonna and I went to Liberty Island and Ellis Island early in the morning. They were both kinda touristy and over-rated, though Ellis Island was pretty moving and fascinating. After that, we wanted to see more of some of the neighborhoods. We saw Washington Square Park, ate at a cool restaurant in SoHo, and accidentally went stumbled on another Sex and the City location, a Tasty D-Lite. We met The Nurse (who had been to the Bronx Zoo) back at the hotel after resting our aching feet for about an hour. We decided to see Central Park next. The park soundly kicked our asses with winding paths and a supreme lack of signage. We saw Strawberry Fields, The Dakota, Belvedere Castle, The Boathouse and the reservoir. After that, after a bit of confusion where we gave a Taxi driver the wrong address, we ended up at Carnegie Deli which was apparently world-famous to everyone but me. This is the place with foot high sandwiches and the best cheesecake on the planet. After that, we planned on seeing Empire State Building but it was closed so we took a walk around the neighborhood surrounding our hotel and basically collapsed in bed.
July 3, 2005: Our last day started with an early wake-up call because Owatonna and I wanted to walk the Brooklyn Bridge. Of course the weather was the most beautiful yet. The bridge was a very positive experience. Everybody we ran into was nice and happy and the bridge and the area surrounding it were so beautiful. I finally got up the nerve to talk to some of the NYPD blue and asked a couple of them if there was an official place to buy NYPD shirts. Back at the hotel, after some confusion about checking out, we all 3 went to the Empire State Building. It was a totally infuriating waste of 2 and a half hours. It was absolutely awful and not worth the misery of standing in line to get to the over-crowded outdoor viewing area. It makes me angry that my last few hours in New York were spent at this god-awful place. I ended up going back to the hotel, getting my stuff, hopping in a cab to Penn Station and then taking the LIRR to the JFK Air Train.
THE MYTHS AND THE REALITIES ACCORDING TO ME:
1. New Yorkers are rude: I didn’t find this at all. The rudest people I ran into were tourists. New Yorkers are an interesting lot. I could tell right away why writers are so fascinated with them. they all seem to have such interesting stories and you can’t help imagining what they are when you are around them. Not to mention, I have never seen so many hot men in one place in my entire life!!
2. The city stinks: The subways do when it’s burning hot and humid and the whole garbage piled on the sidewalk thing is a bit stank. Have they never heard of dumpsters?
3. It’s horribly expensive: When I go to a fancy restaurant here I expect to pay more. Their tax is higher, but I really didn’t find this expensive nonsense to be the case.
4. It’s dangerous and unsafe: I never felt unsafe in Manhattan. I felt a little freaked in Brooklyn, but I was probably over-reacting there as well. It’s dangerous and unsafe crossing the street without looking because cabbies drive psychotically. There’s a reason the roller coaster at New York, New York in Vegas looks like a taxi cab.
Overall, it was the best trip of my life. I would move to New York in a heartbeat if I could afford it. What an exciting place. I am already dreaming of my return trip which will be in the cooler months for sure. My next trip will be to New Orleans in October, if everything goes well. The way it sounds now, my good friend Aries will be going with me. Here’s hoping.
Owatonna and I got off to a very rocky start with our 1PM flight on Wednesday getting cancelled and Northwest damn near losing our luggage. I rebooked for 7AM on the 30th (my birthday) and Owatonna got on a 6AM flight. I flew into Newark. To get to NY I took the light rail to a tram to a plane to an Air Train to a NJ Transit train. The Hotel Grand Union in Midtown was small and economical. I can’t say it was beautiful but I had a very comfortable room of my own that was my own personal refuge away from everything. We were also less than a block from a subway line and you can’t beat that. I had no complaints.
June 30th, 2005: On my birthday we managed to see Ground Zero (which was the quietest, most haunting place. I started crying at one point and couldn’t stop. I went to work like normal in a tall building on that fateful day just like those poor people did. I had to walk away to compose myself.) After getting lost for awhile we ended up in Battery Park because we were going to try to take the ferry to Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty. Walking through the park we came across the foreigners selling the knock-offs and there right in front of me were Kate Spade bags which my sister had asked me to look for. I screwed up with the dickering and ended up paying $25 for one. The second I had the bag in my hands, there was a big commotion and all 25 or so of these guys scooped up the knock offs and literally disappeared into the crowd to avoid the police. It was crazy how fast it happened. We misread the sign at Castle Clinton where you buy tickets to the ferry. Instead, we walked down a few blocks and took the Staten Island ferry. It was humid and hazy but cool on the boat. I took a million pictures of the skyline and talked to a wonderful woman from Australia who explained the difference between a New Zealand accent and hers (there’s very little difference. Get them to say “six”. New Zealanders will pronounce it “sex”.) told me that on the morning of her 30th birthday her 2 year old son woke her up staring at her and proclaimed “You’re old!” and made me promise that on my 40th birthday I would be on a ferry in Sidney Harbor. We went back to the hotel so I could drop Kate Spade off and then hopped back on the subway bound for Coney Island. We had to stand on the train for damn near the entire 45 minutes and ended up in what I considered a pretty scary neighborhood. Coney Island is an ancient amusement park on the beach right in front of some projects. I rode The Cyclone twice (Owatonna could only handle it once) and damn near screamed my brains out. The three of us went on a space needle type thing that gave us a decent view of the surrounding area and then had a Nate’s dog at Nathan’s Famous, as New Yorkers call it. We then walked down to the beach and put our feet in the freezing Atlantic. Back on the train, we passed over the hugest, creepiest cemetery I have ever seen. It was dense and packed with headstones and monuments on both sides of the track as far as the eye could see. It went on forever and was very disturbing. After a quick stop back at the hotel we went to Stonewall bar (a cheesy dive where the gay liberation movement started) and walked around Greenwich Village and Chelsea a bit before finding a place called Sushi Samba to eat. It was very hoity-toity and expensive, but it was a quintessential New York moment. I still didn’t quite believe I was in New York, with the haziness and everything, so I wanted to see Time’s Square. We hopped back on the subway and walked through the area. It was nauseating. It felt like Disney World, Las Vegas and Corporate America threw up there. Every national chain you can think of is there, especially the vomitous over-priced ones like Planet Hollywood and Hard Rock Cafe. A total let-down, but very pretty to see.
July 1st, 2005: The next day was slightly less humid. I ended up taking a walk by myself in the morning and damn near getting lost, like an idiot. I had absolutely no sense of direction in New York and frankly I was too busy drooling over hot guys and seeing the sights to notice where the hell I was going. Eventually I met up with the girls who were hell-bent on going to Old Navy. I went with and quickly got really crabby in the crowded, non-air-conditioned store. I wanted to freak out and snap more than once before I realized that it was noon and I hadn’t eaten anything, therefore crabbiness. We went to a tiny little deli around the corner, ate and Owatonna and I parted ways with The Nurse because we had to get to Pulitzer Fountain in front of The Plaza to go on The Sex and the City tour. I won’t go into how Owatonna hadn’t made reservations even though I had made mine back in March and how she very nearly didn’t make it on the tour because the tour itself overshadowed everything. It was on an awesome luxury bus with TVs showing us the scene from every site we passed. We got out at The Pleasure Chest (where Charlotte bought the rabbit) Magnolia Bakery (where the best cupcakes in the world are made and the site of much lesbian break-up drama) Carrie’s front steps, the park where Carrie ran into Heather Graham and Nina Katz, Hotel Venus (where Charlotte bought lingerie) and Steve’s bar where we had Cosmos. Overall it was fascinating and well worth the $35. After the tour, we met up with The Nurse who had spent an infuriating and bathroom-less afternoon in Chinatown. We went to Grand Central terminal and ate at Oyster Bar which was the most beautiful restaurant I have ever seen. After that, we walked around and saw Rockefeller Center, St Patrick’s Cathedral, and the Chrysler Building. We had a total break-down of frustration at one point and called it an early night.
July 2, 2005: Owatonna and I went to Liberty Island and Ellis Island early in the morning. They were both kinda touristy and over-rated, though Ellis Island was pretty moving and fascinating. After that, we wanted to see more of some of the neighborhoods. We saw Washington Square Park, ate at a cool restaurant in SoHo, and accidentally went stumbled on another Sex and the City location, a Tasty D-Lite. We met The Nurse (who had been to the Bronx Zoo) back at the hotel after resting our aching feet for about an hour. We decided to see Central Park next. The park soundly kicked our asses with winding paths and a supreme lack of signage. We saw Strawberry Fields, The Dakota, Belvedere Castle, The Boathouse and the reservoir. After that, after a bit of confusion where we gave a Taxi driver the wrong address, we ended up at Carnegie Deli which was apparently world-famous to everyone but me. This is the place with foot high sandwiches and the best cheesecake on the planet. After that, we planned on seeing Empire State Building but it was closed so we took a walk around the neighborhood surrounding our hotel and basically collapsed in bed.
July 3, 2005: Our last day started with an early wake-up call because Owatonna and I wanted to walk the Brooklyn Bridge. Of course the weather was the most beautiful yet. The bridge was a very positive experience. Everybody we ran into was nice and happy and the bridge and the area surrounding it were so beautiful. I finally got up the nerve to talk to some of the NYPD blue and asked a couple of them if there was an official place to buy NYPD shirts. Back at the hotel, after some confusion about checking out, we all 3 went to the Empire State Building. It was a totally infuriating waste of 2 and a half hours. It was absolutely awful and not worth the misery of standing in line to get to the over-crowded outdoor viewing area. It makes me angry that my last few hours in New York were spent at this god-awful place. I ended up going back to the hotel, getting my stuff, hopping in a cab to Penn Station and then taking the LIRR to the JFK Air Train.
THE MYTHS AND THE REALITIES ACCORDING TO ME:
1. New Yorkers are rude: I didn’t find this at all. The rudest people I ran into were tourists. New Yorkers are an interesting lot. I could tell right away why writers are so fascinated with them. they all seem to have such interesting stories and you can’t help imagining what they are when you are around them. Not to mention, I have never seen so many hot men in one place in my entire life!!
2. The city stinks: The subways do when it’s burning hot and humid and the whole garbage piled on the sidewalk thing is a bit stank. Have they never heard of dumpsters?
3. It’s horribly expensive: When I go to a fancy restaurant here I expect to pay more. Their tax is higher, but I really didn’t find this expensive nonsense to be the case.
4. It’s dangerous and unsafe: I never felt unsafe in Manhattan. I felt a little freaked in Brooklyn, but I was probably over-reacting there as well. It’s dangerous and unsafe crossing the street without looking because cabbies drive psychotically. There’s a reason the roller coaster at New York, New York in Vegas looks like a taxi cab.
Overall, it was the best trip of my life. I would move to New York in a heartbeat if I could afford it. What an exciting place. I am already dreaming of my return trip which will be in the cooler months for sure. My next trip will be to New Orleans in October, if everything goes well. The way it sounds now, my good friend Aries will be going with me. Here’s hoping.
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